Berny

so for those of you who know me, i have a little friend growing on my right cheek slightly under my eye. for a while i thought it was a boil, but i went to the doctor tonight and found out that it is a "seditious sist." so i have to make an apointment with a dermatologist tommorow to get it removed. hopefully by the end of the week. we'll see. so bye bye berny, you have worn out your welcome.

thanks kylee

tonight was truly a great evening. i was able to enjoy the company of kylee pearson for a night on the town. ms. pearson took me to some really neat places, some that i have overlooked, others that i didn't know existed. to start the evening off we went to this really petite coffee house, called veritas, in garden city and watched a few of her friends play some rather enjoyable music. there were some neat daniel johnston and wilco jams being played as well. and one of the performers daughters did one of the neatest dances i have seen in a while. i honestly watched her most of the show. i was secretly hoping that no one would catch me staring at her thinking i was a pedaphile. i just wanted to be able to dance like her, no worries, just dancing. if i ever perform live, i will dance a whole song imitating that little girl as best i can.

then we went to downtown and went for a small bite to eat at the red feather. this place is like a club from a movie. it was dimly lit, and had really neat lights. the vibe in the place was pretty interesting. i felt like i needed to be 21 to eat there, but i didn't...i don't think.

then to another small coffee shop that i didn't know about, but had this really delicious tea

so thank you kylee for a wonderful evening. and for being honest.

lower. lower.

today i went with a few friends to see a few refugees i met in the fall. these people were from burma, and for some reason that i can't figure out due to language barrier, were displaced in the united states. they do not desire to go home at all, they enjoy the united states, this was most notable by a photograph of two of them next to a cardboard cutout of president bush. i have been back to see them two other times before today, and jenna suggested that we go this weekend. this was a true blessing, because we foud out today that they are moving to florida on monday.

it is tough for me to say goodbye to this very mysterious family. though i only met with them four times, and knew very little about them, due to the language barrier, they still taught me a lot. they taught me hospitality, what it is to be thankful, and that the most important thing in life is being with those we love.

everytime i go there i am reminded of the overabundance of wealth i have. and everytime i leave i forget.

this is my prayer
forgive my selfishness
forgive my ignorance
may i not become fused to the "treasures" of this earth.
may i live to love
make me low!
alleluia

just relax

i have changed in a lot of ways this semester. i am practicing more self control in many ways, i am hanging out with new and different people, and i have been slightly more reserved. several people have asked if i am ok on several locations. i think a lot of people assume the reason i am more reserved these days stems from my recent breakup with inga, which may have some to do with it, but the truth is i am very content at the moment.

perhaps i am finding that not always being in the spotlight is rather enjoyable. it is nice to be on the sidelines in a lot of ways. so thank you truly for your concern, it just shows that my friends care about me and for this i am very grateful. i want to let everyone to know that as of now i am very content in thought and in just being a part of people in general.

more self control please

nate

rejoice

last night we went to the hot springs. every time i go into the wilderness i truly have a spiritual experience. it makes me remember how small i am.

we left the city lights at around 10. and i was praying that we would leave them faster. i couldn't wait until we lost cell phone service. we drove as fast as we could through the thick fog and didn't look back. when we got off the main road we let loose and swirved on the ice.

i love this freedom.

when we finally parked we had to hike up a donkey's trail until i saw a true oasis. the guys stripped into their boxers like adolescents preparing for their first physical. icy feet then melted to fire, but the sting felt great.

i looked up in the haze of the sky and saw a rather fulll moon crowned with a halo. i then looked at the stars and thought about how often people say, "look how far away they are." but i thought the opposite tonight. i felt as if i was in a plantetarium again.

then i looked straight forward at the beautiful painting laid before me. the shades of blue, purple, grey, white. a few hours later our finers had shrunk, and we made our way to the car. as we made our way towards cell phone service there was a subtle grown in the car.

so long nature

until we meet again. hats off

please. continue to make me low. amen amen

more blessings.

tonight i had the honor of going to a jewish synagogue. it was interesting, because i didn't understand a lot of their worship, because it was in hebrew, yet i felt G-d in way i never have. i am truly convinced that we can find G-d in religions other than Christianity. i was reading through some of the meditations in their worship book and felt true sincerity. it is a real shame, because i left my notebook at home, so i was unable to copy any of them for you to read, but they were a true blessing.

i did meet this really neat man afterwards who was very cultured and gave me a title to two movies that he insisted i watch, one was about st. francis.

open wide my door, my Lord, to whatever makes me love you more

may He continue to teach us in the most peculiar ways.

much praise

i am thankful for:
accountability.
newfound self-control.
brothers/sisters.
growing peace.
growing hair.
growing love.
growing patience.

may He continue to make me low.